I have a special guest today! Lucille Griswold is the author of Generations Apart, a novel that shows the life-long impact of sexual assault. In Generations Apart, the assault happened in a college campus decades ago. It makes us question just how much things have changed since, if at all. Sometimes it feels that the only difference between then and now is that we hear more about it now with news being on social media...
One in five college women will be sexually assaulted this year unless something changes, and something NEEDS to change.
Guest Post from Lucille Griswold.
You won't know how it feels Til It Happens To You. No words could be more true. I hope what happens in the Lady Gaga video never happens to anyone, as no individual deserves to be violated nor to experience how it really feels. Coincidence, or not, this video came out around the same time as my book Generations Apart. What happens in my book took place on a college campus and the same can be said for this video that says one in five young women will be sexually assaulted on college campuses this year. The violation in Generations Apart is instigated by a pervert, or one might call the character a villain or criminal. A pervert is defined as one who misrepresents himself, but the character Ben knew exactly what he was doing. What I find disturbing in this video is that these rapes appear to be committed by so called friends of the victims. Today, a hotline is there to help the victims. In years past, one was urged to keep a rape a secret. Perhaps in this one way we have then advanced. While in reality we are told what we wear and what we do should not matter where sexual abuse is concerned, and of course this should be true, Ben in Generations Apart was turned on by a girl dressed in a skimpy outfit. Is it our intention to tell a disturbed mind how to think? Or, are we hopefully attempting to avoid confrontation. Would we intentionally flaunt expensive jewelry on our persona while being in an area known for its crime? Think about it!
Why are friends raping friends? What happened to showing respect for one another? Is the media to blame where every show on HBO, Showtime or whatever channel must have the habitual totally naked sex scene done from every angle imagineable? Are people so lacking in any type of morals and knowledge of beautiful sexual encounters that they must watch these scenes in order to appreciate the totality of the show? Do they need these shows to become sexually stimulated? If this is true folks, it is a sad situation.
Could the mixing of males and females in the dorms be the reason for the increase in sexual crimes? Is liquor the reason? Is it a lack of personal self esteem? Is it ok for a young woman to instigate sex and at the point of no return say she is not interested? Is the young man's object only to conquer his prey? Watching a video such as this one is not going to change things unless we have a proper dialogue to discover why these young college students are so inclined to succumb to unsolicited sexual advances. Or, in other situations to have sex forced upon them. How do we get either the victim or the perpetrator to not be so self indulgent? Let's face it, sexual appetites have been around since the beginning of creation, so that in itself is not the problem. These young women need to be told they are worth something before a crime is committed, not after, so they will know better how to avoid a bad situation. Young men need to learn that REAL men respect and honor women. Real men idolize a woman's body instead of abusing it.
These are a lot of questions that need answers. The answers need to not only come from the young females, but also from the young males. The old fashioned saying of "it takes two to tango" still applies. It does no good to question only one sex if individuals do not know or understand the other sex and their point of view as well. Get the dialogue started parents, advisors, counselors, professors, friends, students. Stop this abusive crime, and the sooner the better.